Expectations Are Bull.

GOAL OF THE WEEK? TOTAL FAILURE.
I skipped school today. Again.
Cos i was so super tired& my eyes didnt have the strength to open up.
That's the extent, despite my maid's constant reminder that it was alr 6.30am.
Can't believe i've gotta wake up at 5.50am just to get ready&travel to school.



Anyway, i cooked 2 out of 7 dishes ystr!
Though my cereal prawns doesnt look like what its called, LOOKS CAN BE DECEIVING!
& my uglily-wrapped seafood rolls were AWESOME!
wheeeeeee~ I <3> COOKING if i don't have to clean up aft that! (:

TanTerry came to my hse too.

& i don't understand the difficulty of SMILING.

just look at the photo! All he does, is to give retarded faces.

& a sun burnt face saves LOTS OF TIME.

ystr, i didnt even have to put foundation& blusher to school.

But right now, my face is peeling quite badly. Especially my nose.

& it looks like i've got skin disease or smth:(

Photos from sentosa on Sunday w Angeline!

>

3 years back, i was a camera noob.

No idea how i managed to take a photo w the camera covering my face-.-
but it seems like, i've never gotten sick of the stripes&lines!

hahaha, compare, Just compare!

Ange looked so boyish in 2006! not that she got rid of her chorlor-ness anyway!

pretty but unglam. Tsktsk!

Oh yes, & I'm super happy that i lost some weight!

FINALLY! after being w Terry & constantly BALLOONING!

lalalala, even my boobs are deflating too, but that's worth the decrease in weight!

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top 2 things causing me to ponder& think hard.

1) I did some research & i totally agree that my condition negatively affects me both socially and functionally in my daily life.

This is what i gathered from my research:

-over activity in a part of the nervous system.

-from childhood & becomes more obvious in the teenage yrs

-occurs in part of the brain causing transmission to the hands and the feet through sympathetic nervous system.

Though the success rate is roughly 98% I don't know if i wanna go for the operation cos it is or is alomost irreversible& beacuse of the diversion factor.

2) My diploma, my education can seriously suck it. I don't even know why i'm in hotel&hospitality.

I have no interest at all, in fact i don't even have a very realistic goal in life.

My attendance sucks& i feel that i can't do well. my goal of the week, & i can't even keep to it.

I don't even have the fighting power to carry on trying. I got a C for tourism. Wtf, a C.

To me, a C is never possible unless its math or science. B is barely enough, what more a C.

14 points without needing to try hard, but so what? take up the best course in school so what? Fucking so what???

what do i know at the end of the day? contribute, so what? worth the grade? Hell no, its just demoralising and thats just that.

GPA's important when things aren't even conducted fairly? what's this? What's this????

Result of what i get for having no aim, no nothing. Fuck.

I should have gone to get a degree in some private institution or overseas just for the sake of owning a degree.

Then again, i can't go overseas because i'm not independent enough.

& i can't leave everything here, and just go, its just impossible.

Always regretting my choices& thinking of the easier way out. Don't even feel like carrying on.

All i need is just time, time to think about what i want & what's possible&impossible.

Its just hard to understand when youre put into a situation where there's no proper start and no end.

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