My life is not the way i want it to be.

I can have everything that I want,
I'm satisfied with all that i have,
But these arent all that I need.


I need to feel important, I need the attention, the love, the care& the concern,
where I've never gotten from my family, at least, not enough.
So what if I can have all the things that I want,
So what if I'm always reminded of how how fortunate I am as compared to others,
I know that my parents are never gonna appreciated anything that I do.
Its hard, even for me to miss them, even more awkward if they tell me that they miss me,
Which has probably never happened.


This is the least that i want from my r/s too.
I have every reason as to why I always need to be reassured.
I want to marry early because I hope that the person would be able to provide me with what I have been lacking.


Right now, My life is so fucked.
I'm not motivated to study for the 2 UTS tmrw.
I'm so ready to flunk this two & regret later.
I'm struggling, trying to be independant.
I'm sorting out my thoughts.
&just losing myself and who I was.




Because it so hard to understand all that i go through,
Sometimes I'm amazed at how I'm able to come this far,
I've crossed boundaries & i'm not who I used to be.
My life is fucked now, & so am I.