Charlie Sheen 'Today' show interview: I've got tiger blood, Adonis DNA, and I'm tired of pretending I'm not special

 Charlie Sheen says he's a warlock with tiger blood and Adonis DNA who deserves to be making $3 million an episode for "Two and a Half Men." He says CBS, which shut down production on the show for the remainder of the season after last week's rants, owes him "a big one, publicly, while licking my feet." He says he cured his own addiction problems by closing his eyes and making it so. "I'm tired of pretending I'm not special," he tells NBC's Jeff Rossen. "You can't process me with a normal brain."

Perhaps the best moment of the must-see interview, filmed Sunday at the Beverly Hills home Sheen now shares with his two "goddesses" (a porn star and a model), came when Rossen asked Sheen whether he was now sober. "Look at me," says the haggard, ranting Sheen. "Duh!"

Sheen (who also gave an interview to ABC that will air tomorrow) says that CBS is waging a war against him. "They're trying to destroy my family, so I take great umbrage with that. And defeat is not an option. They picked a fight with a warlock." When asked exactly CBS was trying to destroy Sheen's family, he said: "They're trying to take all my money and leave me with no means to support my family," says Sheen, who admits he has been making "roughly" $2 million an episode this year and says he's got a number of great movie offers on the table.

Sheen, who has struggled with sobriety for two decades, also targeted Alcoholics Anonymous once again, saying the 12-step program was authored by a "broken-down fool who was a plagiarist ... They think it was a one-size-fits-all, but it didn't fit me." He doesn't rule out some Champagne or wine in the future, because, after all, that's how one celebrates. But he's not worried about slipping back into addiction. That script, he says, "was written for nomal people, people who aren't special, people who don't have tiger blood and Adonis DNA." (You'd think someone with Adonis DNA wouldn't require some help in the hair department, though.)
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